Consistency, Consistency, Consistency

I have talked about this many times on here, and if you belong to them whom I have correspondence with you have heard me saying it there too. One of the major factors in successfully training and keeping a slave is to be consistent in everything you do, say and act. When you have trained your slave right you have a calm, docile and focused slave who is looking to you for guidance and control.

But this is easier said than done. It is very easy to take the slave for granted, complacency is just around the corner and you will become a lazy owner with a yet confused slave who thinks it is her fault why you don’t punish her for her indiscretions or blunt failures. No matter what kind of slave you have or what kind of approach you use, you need to watch her, control her and punish her whenever she is doing wrong or acting outside her given boundaries. If you want her to act on her own or  feel that she need her own space, you are not an lifestyle dominant with a slave, but a Dom or a top playing house.

You might think sometimes you are being too hard on her, that you not giving her the benefit of the doubt, that she deserves a second chance, but that is where you are wrong and that is when it all starts to slip away from you. A slave needs to be controlled, she needs to know that you are watching her every move, that you will control that all of her duties being done the way you want them to be done, and that she will be accountable for her mistakes, deliberate or otherwise. Keeping the pressure on her will help her focus; it will help her making the right decisions and not have her mind wander. When all her decisions are done for her, and she doesn’t have to think about what to do or how to do it, she will not question your right as an Owner. That comes from training her, watching her and correcting her mistakes and punishes bad behaviour…at all times.

When you now being consistent, you do what you said you would do, you keep to your rules and makes her abide to them religiously, you have your rituals and you make her follow all the protocols you have in your life, all of this tells her that you care about her, you show her that your life and your lifestyle matters, that you believe in her and what you have built outside normality. Society will always be knocking on the door, and keeping your words and follow through will show her that this is the life the both of you have chosen and this is how it will be for as long as you live. Society can never touch her and make her that confused being she once was.

So take this advice very seriously. Don’t become a lazy, preoccupied Owner that doesn’t appreciate what you have at your feet. she is there to keep you warm at night and make your life comfortable and enjoyable. Don’t take her for granted or she will slip through your fingers if you do. Given the right training and attention she will never let you down, not once. She will be there at your beck and call, through thick and thin, no matter what happens in your life. A devoted slave is the best thing any man can ask for, and all it takes is a little effort and consistency, believe me.

Women Explained

I love women, I really do; they are softer, smell nicer and have very keen senses when dealing with other people, decorating my home, making nice dinners and put a final touch on things. Women are caregivers through and through, much comes from the fact that they are the ones that get pregnant and naturally takes care of the children. It is in their nature, it is in their genes to give comfort and ease to everyone around them. So it is nothing strange when most woman have submissive feelings and slave tendencies, they just need to be tuned, trained and motivated to blossom.

So men and women are different, we think differently and we have different needs, anyone who tell me otherwise is either deluded from society or just plain blind. Men are hunters, warriors and leaders while women are gatherers, child bearer and followers. We complement each other, no questions about that. Men are intelligent and are able to see the bigger picture, to have great thoughts about life, universe and everything, while women look to details and are great for mundane work. Just look at needlework or embroidery, not many men have the patience to sit and do that. Also you don’t want to discuss important matters with a woman, or teach them complicated things, it is not worth your while and you only get frustrated.

Women look for money, power, intelligence, strength and attitude in a male. Why? It is because women want a safe place to raise their children and they want someone who can protect them and put food on their table. They want a father figure, one that they can rely on so that they can have as many offspring as possible. It is simple mathematics and natural selection at work; all animals live to procreate and their genes lives forever. That is why you see so many young women with older, richer and intelligent men. They see stability and safety and a life with many children, not on a conscious level perhaps but still they know they have found a good mate. As for being slaves it is what comes natural for them, to take direction, follow order and do unimportant things. A woman love a simple life, they want a carefree existence and to keep everything the same. This is ingrained in their soul. I have trained many women as pets, dolls and done it to perfection. Women are really good at just being a pet or just a doll and do nothing but wait to be used and played with. It is astonishing how easy it is to take perfectly adapted women and turn her into a mindless and happy puppy running around on all four within months.

But women don’t like lazy, submissive and complacent men. When some women are confronted by a submissive inferior male they get mean, they get angry and they do everything to emasculate that person even more. What they get is confused; they don’t know how to handle it when they are more intelligent, mentally stronger and dominant. I have seen the most hard core female slave doing the most horrible things to male slaves, and on several occasions. But the problems arises when a female take this confusion of theirs and make it into female dominance, which is plain stupid as a concept if you agree to my reasoning earlier. Not only has the woman dubious feeling about her true identity in society but now she is supposed to take all the male traits and make her own. It is destined to fail, as I have encountered so many times. Earlier years I was determent to find an equal mate, a dominate female with whom I would train and keep slave together with. It was futile to say the least, every time I thought I found one, she rolled over and became my slave, every time! So much of my reasoning and experience comes from those years. NOTHING good comes from females pretending to be dominant, mark my words.

Middle East’s view of things

Muslim Sex Slave?

I don’t really agree much when it comes to the Muslim faith or way of life, it seems to me to be backwater countries several of hundreds of years behind the western world when it comes to freedom of speech, democracy and religious rights. But what the hell, there are countries over here too that I have doubts about when it comes to those ideals, so who I am to judge.

One thing I do like about them is their view on women and female rights. I let this article from June this year, speak for itself.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2000292/Men-allowed-sex-slaves-female-prisoners-job--WOMAN-politician-Kuwait.html

Life in the fast lane

A year came and went. I can’t believe it is already a year since my last post but to my defence I have been busy with a lot of work and also training slaves for others. I get a about 10 requests every week about being a slave here. I get about 1-3 questions a week from other Owners about training and I get about 1 question a week about taking on a slave for a short term from Owners.

Most if not all requests from slaves are from people who don’t dare to take this step, who still have it as a fantasy. They are all confused, scared of their own feelings and generally dont know how to handle it. They sit and watch porn and trolling forums. One hand on the keyboard and the other between their legs. They need this kind of life that I am offering them, as all women do, and I am the one to help them but the societies grip of them are too strong.

I would say that half of all females that contacts me, really are men who want to get training tips from me. That is really annoying and insulting. If you are dominant and hide behind a female pseudonym you are just pathetic and deserve only ridicule and humiliation. I would say that most of these are from US judging from how they write, and that just confirm my thesis about US dominants are a sad bunch.

A lot of you write to me asking for training tips on how to train your own slave. That is all fine but when you want a detailed plan for it, I get a bit miffed. There is no such thing as easy bake bdsm lifestyle training just add water and you're done. You have to think for yourself and do your homework and try and see what works for you. I can only point you in the right direction and the rest must come from you. I love a good discussion so bring it on, but don’t expect me to show you every possible way forward.

Enough ranting for now. As I said, life is good, I am working hard, living hard and enjoying every minute of it. Right now I am on a 3 week vacation and I will do more posts later.

Breaking the Barriers

When training a slave into perfection you need to have a great understanding of the mind of a slave, and the different levels of resistance she has to break through to become the kind of property you want in your life. The different levels have different approaches and some are very hard to break but it will be worth your while if you go that extra mile when doing it.

The resistance consist of many different emotions and feelings. The strongest is fear. It can be fear of losing control, losing contact with her old life or that she is not good enough being the worthless piece of shit that she is. Other than fear there are limits and boundaries. Breaking those limits and moving boundaries is essential for every slave. If limits would be respected the slave will never be all that she can be, it is a huge part of training her, to completely remove her limits and having her boundaries stretched to maximum.

Limits is things the slave would consider unacceptable in some form, it can be things like needles, anal use, animals, blood, objectification and so on. Some limits like children is of course not something you remove, it goes without saying. Limits can be defined by boundaries if you want to complex the issue. Most limits must be removed to be able to take complete control of the slave. It will make her stronger in her belief when she overcomes her limits.

Boundaries is a natural part of who you are, it is about integrity and protecting yourself. When you have strong boundaries you are received as a strong person in todays society, who stand up for your beliefs and who you are. You have a good sense of how people receive you and you are in control of your own feelings; you know that you can never be responsible for how other people feel. In the process of getting strong boundaries you learn about who you are and how you influence your surroundings. So it is of course important that you address those boundaries immediately when dealing with a slave. Boundaries must be moved, the slave must be aware of who she is and that she is nothing but a worthless and stupid slave. We dont want strong boundaries in a slave, for obvious reasons. she would be useless to us.

In order to move boundaries you need humiliation, guilt, shame and blame. Many would say this is not healthy but I say it is a different kind of healthy. I don’t want strong boundaries on any slave even if I want a strong productive slave. There is a difference. Look at religion, the house of any religion use this as a tool to make loyal servants since the dawn of man. It is just about how the society sees it, if it is to be an acceptable way of treating another human being.

When stretching boundaries you make sure the slave is aware of her insignificance as property but it is her responsibility to make you happy, that you feel good and that you have everything you need. When she fails she is blamed and judged that she is useless and not worthy to be your slave, she need to know that she needs to do better if you want to be the kind of slave you need, she need to hear that she will be punished, even if it is not her fault, she need to take responsibility for your fault as well, and accept it. She must learn to take her punishment and accept that she has no control of her life and most of all no control of the person she is becoming. You need to be harsh on her every day, you need to blame her for everything even the littlest thing, to judge her and telling her that she is bad and useless, she need to know it is her fault and no one else’s.

So you see humiliation, guilt shame and blame is important tools for you to make a good slave. Once she takes responsibility for your feelings she will be extremely attentive to your every move, your every need and your every desire, regardless of her own situation, feelings or needs. She will believe that if you are happy she is happy; when you are satisfied she is satisfied. Her boundaries are moved and the last of resistance is gone.

Of course there is room for positive reinforcements as well, but keep it separated to not confuse the slave. Don’t blame her one minute and then praise her the next. When she is in the blame and guilt state of mind she must not be praised or be given a gentle touch. That will only be counterproductive. Keep the two on separate occasions and be aware of who you are to your slave. You are her owner, her guardian and she is responsible for how you feel or she will not have your praise and protection.

I hope this make sense to you. In my next post I will discuss the different stages you can see in a slave when training her into perfection.

An Update II

The slave named amanda has left to join her real Owner a couple of weeks ago. Sorry to not inform you all who have asked about her status. It is always nice to have a slave around and she was one of the more clueless ones, just how I like them actually. she did good and I am pleased, there is only so much to do in so little time when it comes to training a slave. I think you out there understand what I mean, if you have owned and trained slaves that is.

An update

I have been busy with work and also having fun with the slave amanda who is staying here while her owner is away. I am extremely happy about the enormous responds from all of you who follow this blog. You have been asking about her progress and also asking for more posts about my life and my ways. A fair amount of slave girls has contacted as well me to get advice about their own situation and how to get on with a life as a slave, or how to get into the lifestyle all together. A total of 32 messages, email, and contact on yahoo show that I am not alone and what I am about are what many others do or want to get into.

The slave called amanda is doing well, she had some problem to accept the cage and what it represent, but she is now sleeping comfortable in it and has made it her home. she has gone from being very unfocused, lively and basically all over the place to now being very aware of her movements, speech, where I am at all times, ways to please me, my rituals and some of my house rules. she is on the road of being a very productive slave and property and I hope her owner will be pleased when he comes back. she is no way near to live up to the standard I have but she is on her way and she is very responsive to new things now. When she came here she was very scared about being whipped or abuse in any kind of way, but now she understands the need and the reason behind it and, even if it is still hard on her, she takes it more or less silently. The first step in becoming a good slave is totally accept the new life, the status of being worthless and being treated as a mindless object. Most slaves say they do already accept this fact but when they really realize this, often in the middle of training, they break down and start crying or have an anxiety attack. It has nothing to do with regret or to want to be somewhere else; it is just a release of tension from a long time being someone else in vanilla world. The inner fight is going on all the time when a slave has not accepted her faith, and little by little the training peels the doubts and resistance away from her and within a year or so she has completely accepted the authority of her owner and other dominants around her and she is truly ready to serve in a more honest way than before.

amanda has only had one small breakdown yet where she now accept me and the life here, but she knows it is just temporary and she probably hang on to that. Hopefully her owner will take this to the next level when they are back home. I would hate to see this effort of mine gone to waste now when I have started breaking her mind and her inner resistance.

A slave need focus, she need to understand that nothing in her life will ever be the same again once she is accepted as property to her Owner. she is controlled in every way possible and that is how it must be, if you as an owner fail to control her every move, thought and behavior you will end up with a confused and unhappy slave, because they want to be controlled all the way and beyond. They do not want to make decisions about anything; it makes them nervous and uneasy. If you let them think for themselves they will in time leave you or get hurt in some way or the other. A true slave do not want to think, she want to be dependent on you as her guardian and owner, she looks to you for everything and you better deliver. amanda has started to understand this and she is more happy than when she got here. she responds very quickly to every command and order I give her, and with a smile. This smile and a wish to eagerly serve my every wim is what this is all about, no matter if it is domestic, full fledge abuse or sexually she doesn’t hesitate to perform, and she is upset when she feels she is not being at her very best and when she feels she has let me down. she is not a very smart slave, I would even say she is a simpleton, but she do make up for it in attitude and good behavior, and I enjoy to see her trying harder and harder to please me. It is the sadist in me who like to see how far I can push her. I like it a lot and I am damn good at it.

A helping hand

I want to welcome amanda into the household. Her owner, a friend of mine, will be away for business for 2-3 month and have asked me to look after her and also teach her my ways in being a slave. she has expressed a desire to become completely objectified and trained into a mindless but useful slave. she is 22 and have over 2 years as submissive and one year as a slave to her current owner. she is from US but lives in UK.

I have been allowed to show her picture by her owner. she had a rough welcome here and that is the reason for the long face. I don’t believe in a soft introduction so it came as a surprise for her, but no harm done. she is already showing a good attitude and eagerness.

Please comment on her appearance or berate her for her choice in life. she need the humiliation.

Who am I

Some of you who follow this blog might wonder who I am and what makes me tick, what my experiences are and what I do when I am not training and educating slaves. I have been accused of being inhuman in my extreme ways when making a girl into a well performing slave. So let me tell you about me.

I am a well adjusted person in the vanilla world. I work as much as I have to, I pay my taxes, I enjoy the company of others and I am have never been to jail or in trouble with the law on any level. I have my own little company in a very lucrative business and I keep a very good life here in Sweden.

I wouldn’t say I am a violent man but I do have a violent past. I have a black belt in martial arts and I have worked for many years as a bouncer. My assertive behavior was very much formed during these years and made me understand more about who I really was and what kind of life I wanted. Later when I started to practice bdsm and taking this lifestyle as mine it all fitted and I wouldn’t want anything else.

When it come to women they are property to me, they are my toys and there for my amusement. They make my life easy and enjoyable. If it was up to me, all women should be slaves, not submissive, pure and real slaves for all men to use and abuse. you can argue about women’s lib all you want but to me they are not my equal and will never be. I treasure them like everything else that is in my possession, I keep them clean and healthy, always, but I don’t want to discuss important matters with them or leave them with too much responsibility. They are just not built for that.

I objectify women, and I keep them locked up when needed. Their status as property is very real to me, their needs and their wants is irrelevant and that is what I teach. I take a girl or a woman and remove all of her doubts, inhibitions, limits and priorities and make her into a completely focused slave who put her owner before her own needs. Some I train into dehumanized pets or dolls where they are just mindless things waiting for being used and abused. I don’t see any wrong in this and I don’t hear any complaints from those who should complain ie the slaves.

I know, this sounds completely inhuman, and it probably is when you look at it from the outside. I prey on innocent and confused girls who can’t fight for themselves, right? Well, that is where the vanilla world and I differ in opinion. I believe in the free choice in life, where you can chose to give yourself to another person without anyone should come and think they are better than you and try to take your freedom of choice away from you by telling you that you are seek or weak or what not.

My view of women as property is also something vanilla people have a problem with, and I don’t blame them, we are all a product of a society who tells everyone that we are made equal and should have equal rights, that is all fine, but I don’t buy it and there is nothing you can do about it, sorry. I haven’t met one single woman who truly are dominant or even know what she is doing. Even the most hardened assertive woman I have met roles over when I push her into a corner. Believe me I have been looking pretty hard. I would love to have an extreme woman by my side that helps me in training slaves.

So if you are a vanilla person reading this and are about to send me a comment about what an a-hole I am , don’t. I will just laugh at your feeble attempt and your twisted pathos of justice. The world is not a pretty place and people have a mind of their own, so deal with it.

Another slave ready to serve

I want to use this post to thank slave53 who has been trained for 2 months by me and are now ready to go back to her owner. she has been extremely obedient and showed an great aptitude for this lifestyle and has done a great impression on me.

she has reached all of her goals and is now ready to serve as a sexual and domestic slave, completely objectified and ready to go deeper in her slavery on all levels.

I give a thank to her owner as well who entrusted me with his most valuable property. I am sure he will be very pleased with the result and the new attitude of his slave.

Training a sex slave

I have earlier talked about training slaves using goal oriented approach. I now want to give you some idea of what I mean.

I always try to have a basic and advanced level and also have very clear goals and one main goal. To show you an example I give you my curriculum for training a sex slave. Depended on the slave, I use whole or just parts of this program. Every part of this can be discussed further and should be, it is after all only an outline for how to train your slave in a strict and methodically way.

N.B. This training is of course combined with other disciplines, and they should coincide with each other.

Basic training
1. Sexual services. Obedience and focus on cock and pussy.

2. cunt and anal training. Learn to squeeze a cock. Expansion of holes.

3. Deep throat training with dildo

4. Be used by other people one on one. Closed sessions

5. To learn to drink cum and urine

6. Masturbation in front of others. fingers, toys

7. Orgasm control. Orgasm denial.

8. Sensuality training. Learn how to move and behave sensually. Positions and stands. Presentation.

9. Oral Servitude ( cock and cunt). Also use of ring gag or mouth spreader, learning pleasing with just lips, just lips and tongue and deep throat

10. Endurance. To be able to be used for several hours. Not to cum.

11. Restrictive training. No talk or sound, no matter what is done to the slave. Always eye contact or no eye contact.


Advanced Training
1. Made to use bigger dildos

2. Rough sex training. To be used hard and brutal with a lot of spanking and beating on breast and cunt. (Only for pain sluts)

3. Used in open sessions with multiple partners.

4. Sensitivity training. Breast and cunt torture. (Only for pain sluts)

5. Be used in public places. Used in discreet but still public places.

6. Being whored out, rented out. (Optional)

7. Learn to please a stranger.

8. Cock attendant. Wash, suck and care for cock. Focus on pleasing all cocks. Hold cock while owner is peeing, sleep with cock in mouth or in ass.

9. Orgasm without touch

10. Initiative training. The slave is trained to take initiative for sex and being used. Rewarded every time she get someone to cum from her actions. Punished when she is out of line or fails in her efforts.

Goals

1. To be able to be used by any man or woman. Regardless of size or force. A three hole slave.

2. To have the right focus and to eagerly perform her duty without hesitations or doubt

3. Become a fuck doll in look and use. To transform appearance with cloths and attitude. If possible to have body modifications; breast and lips, bleach anus and smaller labia

4. To be able to use the body in every way to induce pleasure.

MAIN GOAL

To be an eager sex slave with no inhibitions.

Just a quick note. I will be back with more posts shortly. Meanwhile be sure to read the comments on here.They are at the bottom of each posts. Just click on the link to take you there. There are a lot of useful information in there.

Pictures of a Slave

I have been attacked today by a slave who was upset about the selection of pictures I have. It is to sad to see that some are so wrapped up in self pity and have so low self esteem that they don't read the words but just look at the pictures. And even if they do read the words they get it wrong because of a clouded mind, all because of these pictures.

The pictures are mostly stock photos, with some exceptions. They are just there for decorations and to make the reading a little more lighter. So, please, understand this; the pictures do not represent the kind of body I think a slave should have. Most slaves I have owned or trained has been on the larger side.

So, rant's over, let us focus on the written words from now on, shall we!

The first Pain

To administer pain to a person takes a lot of skill and experience. One would claim it is an art and the whip and cane are your brushes. You paint the subject with welts, marks and bruises for shorter and longer times, and if you are anything like me you proudly look at your result with great joy and excitement.

The whole experience in inflicting pain to a slave is a complete one; it is on so many levels and touches so many feelings inside of you. The sight of the slave incapable to escape, the slight fear in her eyes, the scent of her when the pain is manifesting in her mind and the endorphin start to kick in, the feel of the cane or the flog or the whip, the almost slow motion moments when the whip hits the flesh and the one second of delay until the pain reached the slave's mind is all so beautiful, poetic if you want.

For the slave it should be as intoxicating, if you have trained her right, and of course you have, haven’t you? The association between pleasure and pain is mind-bending for the slave or so it should be. She should welcome pain, embrace it as her best friend and learn to harness it fully until she cum in a explosive orgasm. But only if you want it, delivering pain can be punishment and harmful and bitter sweet too. It is you as her Owner and guardian that decide that, and only you.

When you are about to hang her up and you are taking down the whip for the first time, you should have some certain rules in mind. First and foremost you must never be angry; you should always do it for the right reason. If it is punishment you are after, the slave certainly deserve it, I’m sure, but you must never do it out of anger, you better calm down before you do more harm than good. The slave look to you for leadership and guidance, she looks up to you as she looks up to her own father and that trust must never be broken by a hasty conducted punishment where the slave might not understand the reason or the rage. Punishment must always be thought through; the slave must understand why she is being punished, the punishment must be just and fit the indiscretion and she must accept her punishment before it can take place. I will talk more about punishment in a later post.

Another rule is to know the slave and her current limit. You need to remember that a slave and especially women have certain days when they are more sensitive than other days. You need to know her experience in handling pain and her ability to focus on the pain to make it more durable.

Once you have started you need to be aware of how to administer it properly and not just whack away with your whip or your cane. Every stroke most count. That means you must let it take some time before the next hit. The purpose is not just to make a welt or a red bottom, no, it is not, the slave must have time to process it, feel it and in the end accept it. By accepting the pain she accept her situation as a slave and by that your superiority and ownership over her. Isn’t that what we want?

When the slave starts to get use to the pain she can start to drift off, into sub space, like some cleverly want to call it, it is when the slave is no longer aware of the pain, she has shielded her from your treatment and that is not what we want. The purpose is to get control of her and/or punish her, and she cannot get away that easy. There are times when I just want to whack away and beat my slave up, just for the thrill of it and that is the only time I allow her to drift off like that. I should also tell you that I only do that with experienced slaves that are masochist by nature. To prevent a slave from feeling her pain I use to let her count the strokes out loud and by doing that you have an exercise in speech training as well. It could sound like “Sire, ONE, Sire, thanks you, Sire, can I have another one Sire.”. This whole sentence is always hard to learn and they forget it all the time in the beginning. But once learned it sticks and you have a very obedient slave who will start and end every sentence with Sire. Most effective, I would say.

There are some areas on the body you must never hit with blunt force, i.e. cane, whip or other hard object, and that is on the lower back where the kidneys are. Always stay away from there; also never hit the head or the neck. The rest is up for a beating but every part has its limits and if you don’t know what you are doing, stay on the butt, it is always safe there.

When you are in the middle of it all and enjoying yourself immensely as you should, take a moment and look at your slave who is now in pain and agony just for you, she is taking this because you want it and because she wants to be a good slave to you. She is the heroine in the room, not you, even if you are the one who is in control. Never forget this, ever.

When the slave is starting to reach her limits it is time to talk her down if it has been a hard session. She needs to be hold and told that she has been a good slave to you, that she is being brave and that you are proud of her. Most of all she need to accept that this is how it should be and always will be, by accepting this she is accepting you as her owner and caregiver. This is most important so don’t forget to do this. In a later post I will go into details in how to train a slave for pain. Thanks for reading this. As always comments are welcome.

The right to say NO

Being a slave is a choice you make and once you are owned you have no more choices in life.

To say NO is a sin to a slave and her goal is to completely surrender all control to her owner and to obediently accept everything that is done to her (within agreed hard limits) and also to trust him to make the most out of her. To make this a little more interesting I would say there are two kinds of slavery; consensual slavery and non consensual slavery. The consensual kind is where the slave has a way out of the agreement when she say NO to her owner and where she no longer accept his training of her and her living condition. By doing this she has no more value to her owner and her contract is terminated. At this point the owner either renegotiates the contract and everything that comes with that or he releases the slave.

I see slavery much like marriage and that there are no way out once the contract is agreed upon. A no consensual slave has no way out of her contract unless it is a time limited one. If she wants to change things she need to be taking it up with her owner and persuade him for a change, there is no other way. It is my belief that being a slave is a lifetime commitment and not something you take on lightly, but that goes both ways. To be a Master and an owner is, as I said many times before, a huge responsibility and not something you do when you have some time to spare.

I often see the term submissive used with being a slave or a clearly submissive person label herself as a slave. In my opinion that only shows the level of experience of the person who use it. Being submissive is about giving your Dom/mme control of you on some levels, but not all. She has the right to say NO without jeopardizing her relation with her Dom/me. It is the submissive that decide how much control she is ready to give up. Being a slave is not a submissive that gives up all control, that is completely wrong in my opinion. A slave does not even need to have a submissive personality and hence being submissive, just being forced to obey and complete ownership could be the driving force for a slave, not just submitting power to someone. I think this article by Deborah Teramis Christian explain this better than I ever can.

As always, tell me what you think about this matter.

Little shop of horror

A good place to go when you want very well crafted bondage equipment is Top to Bottom Leathers I found this gem a couple of years ago and I have never been disappointed.

The picture is of lockable collar and manacles with a matching leash. They are very nice and comfortable for the slave. They never want to take it off and will tell you they feel naked without it.

No, I am not getting paid for this. I just want to share. :-)

Coming Home

When a person have the possibility to become a slave and to relocate to her new Owner, there is a lot of indecisiveness going on in her head, she is being confused and she’s wondering if she is doing the right thing. Is she ready to take this step? Is she prepared to leave her old life completely or partly? But also practical things like what to do with her belongings, her loans on the flat and her car, those worldly possessions she won’t need anymore.

But her biggest fear, the one that is holding her back, to my knowledge at least, is that her owner will reject her and throw her out of the household when he's gotten tired of her or he feels she is fully trained or being too old. All the What IF’s is tearing her apart and leaves her standing doing nothing with her life. Her insecurity is so deep that she rather not takes the leap of faith than facing the possibility to one day being abandoned with nothing but the cloths on her back and a toothbrush. For instance the possibility to be sold is more appealing to a slave then to be let back into the vanilla world as long as she is not rejected. My former slave rebecca’s fear manifested itself in the way that she wanted to be sold or given away to a new owner after 3 years service, just to avoid the risk of being left on the street one day by a bored owner.

So to address these issues I want to start with the abandonment issue. Training a slave into being able to serve her Owner and all his quirks take a lot of time and effort. As an owner you plan training, think about ways to make her a better slave and motivate her to go that extra mile, you do this every day, you feel that responsibility on your shoulders and you watch her grow and prosper into the property you so much want and need in your life. If you don’t understand what I mean or don't agree you have probably not owned a slave in your life or you have not understood anything I have posted here in this blog.

When a slave owner do all this and are able to explain this to you as a slave you know you are safe in his care. You know he will never abandon you one day just like that, he has too much invested in you and he wants value for his money. But on the other hand if the owner you talk to have no clue in what he will do with you, he has no methods, no philosophy or goals for your training and use, then he is more likely to throw you out when he has had his fun, or he is going to turn into a boyfriend and stop controlling your life, or worse (I’ve heard) become a submissive boyfriend you can easily top from the bottom. you don’t want that, do you?

The other issues about leaving the old life, leaving all your things behind are not to be ignored either of course. This is a huge step to take and to not take that seriously is a big mistake, and it need to be thought through every way possible, but think about this; if you have had slave tendencies all your life, you are naturally submissive towards other people especially dominant figures in your surroundings, in your free time you constantly think about being owned and being a slave and you surf the net for bdsm sites and talk to other slaves about it all the time, then maybe that is what you are and should do something about it. As a consequence to not doing anything you have low self esteem, you have problem connecting to other people and being close to those who love you, you are unfocused and you seem never to get a break in your professional life, you have one abusive boyfriend/girlfriend after the other or you just don’t seem to get that relationship thing going at all, maybe you are into self hurting because you are confused about who you are and think nobody loves you because you are not worthy of their love and you don’t feel anything or care about anything.

The list goes on, but my point being, if you thinking about being a slave and it feel so right it hurts, you relate to all those stories you read and those pictures you looked at, and you want more than anything to swap places with other slaves you talk to. I can tell you that you have what it takes and should follow your dream, not looking back. Some people are meant to be famous, some are meant to be grey vanilla people and some are meant to be slave owners and slaves. It is not about being strong enough or about all those things you have been collected over the years, it is about being who you really are deep down and to go with what your heart tells you to, and ignore that voice in your head that is put there by society and your upbringing. Your new owner will train you and make you into a new being who is all strong and focused, and that cannot be happening by itself, it takes a lot of effort on your Owners part and you should be thankful to him every day in your life because finally you came home and it is where you belonged all along.

Are You Man Enough

My former slave rebecca was trained to take a lot of beating, humiliation, torture and abuse. she was trained to be completely silent during the ordeal, no matter how much I lay on her, only some murmur or sobs could sometimes pass her lips but overall she was a brave slave every time. It took a long time to train her into that behavior but in the end she mastered it. The strange thing was every time I asked if I was too rough on her or if I went too far, the answer was always no, I could have pushed further and done more. I have seen this during all my years and I have come to a conclusion I now want to give you.

When starting to train a slave in pain, humiliation, rules, obedience and what not the slave is confused and when you push her she crumbles and falls like a deck of cards. So you stop pushing because you think your are at the limit of what that slave can take, I mean she is crying, she shivers, she is being very vulnerable. This is where you are wrong; she is just confused and not aware of her own potentials. This is why I don’t believe in safewords or signs. They are just for play and for kinky sex games, nothing else.

What you need to do is push harder and further, set goals for the slave and every time she reaches them give her a treat, and then give her a new goal. Make her understand that the more she can take for her Owner, the better she is serving you. Not only abuse but also domestic chores, rules, humiliation and everything you do to your slave. When she is well trained she is ready to take a lot more even if she is standing in the middle of a square naked or if she is completely covered in welts and bruises and black and blue all over.

My point in all this is that a slave can be so much more for you, she can be that perfect sex doll for you, sucking you dry in seconds, or that pain toy keeping you happy while you are beating her for hours and she is never complaining. I always seem to underestimate my slaves and they always end up asking for more. more control, more rules, more abuse. It seem to be no end of how hard you can treat a slave when you once push passed that first confused state and guided her into that complete nirvana of obedience and endurance. So you need to ask yourself if you are man enough to take her there or if you are just going to settle with a mediocre slave, who is not fulfilling all your wishes and dreams.

The Stuborn slave

Ok, so you got a new property, a new slave, maybe she is young and it is her first time. The first 2-4 weeks is going well, but then she start to become restless, she start questioning your authority, she doesn’t respond as quickly as before, she complains and talks out of order and start showing an attitude. Sounds familiar? What went wrong?

First of all, it is your fault! She has nothing to do with this; she is just reacting to your treatment and your leadership. Do not take it out on her, being frustrated and angry. she is after all just property and has no blame in how she has been trained, guided and used. If you do, you have lost and the road back to trust is long and hard even if you take drastic measures. So let us start analyzing the why’s before we go to the how’s.

There are many things that are happening to a slave the first weeks when introduced into a new household, everything is new and she is focused on living up to her new expectations, it all keeps her mind busy and she looks to you for leadership and guidance. She has a lot of expectations of her own but they are put on the side for now, she’s making an effort to accommodate all your needs. When the first weeks of turmoil has faded and she is getting used to the environment and most of all starting to know you, her mind start to wander, her own expectations resurface and she start to questions her decisions, she has a lot of limits, boundaries and norms from her old life and upbringing that start questioning her choices. All in all, there are a lot of things going on in the mind of the slave, consciously or not. (Read more about barriers here)

To my experience there are two ways to go when this happens, or a mix of the two. The softer way with a physiological approach and or the harder way which means to start over and do what you should have done from the first day when she arrived. I have visited this in an earlier post but I take this one more time just for the sake of argument.

The softer way start with a total revamp of your commitment to each other. Go through the expectations you both have, set goals for her training and be very clear about her purpose as a slave to you. She must be totally aware of what she is and what her duties are. She needs constantly supervision and guidance, she needs strict set of rules, rituals and protocols that tells her how to act and behave in everyday life, she needs stringent control in speech, posture, attitude and services. she need to learn that you are in control and that you never will let her get away with unproductive behaviors, you need to be consistent in your orders and always following up when you have given her a task to do, make sure she has done it well and praise her if she done good and correct her or punish her when she has done bad. Never take her word for it, always control, give her attention and keep her busy; that is what she needs and seeks from you, i.e. your approval. Every night have a Q&A where she is allowed to speak freely about any issues she has and where she is not punished for speaking out of turn. Let her write a journal where she can put all of her thoughts into that she feels she are not able to bring up to your face. You will read this journal and address issues you feel are important for her development; also you have a good tool for checking on her mental health and stability.

The harder approach is more hands on and is used when you want a completely obedient slave and are prepared to force your will on her i.e. not completely consensual. It starts with a thorough assessment of the slave’s weaknesses and strengths. Take your time and put it down on paper and then it is time for 1-2 weeks of tough love for the slave. She need to understand that her only expectations on you are that she is allowed to serve you, that her only goal is how to serve you better, her only purpose in life are to serve you, she is not a thinking being, she is guided by your rules and your word is law. She needs to be mentally broken down, after all you cannot fill a glass of water if it is already full, it needs to be emptied out. Use your list of weaknesses. Hang her up, whip her, beat her, flog her, abuse her body and make sure she is not drifting into sub space. Take her down let her simmer and reflect, start over, push her limits, tell her over and over again what her purpose is and keep verbally abusing her, constantly humiliate her. If you want to go the extra mile shave her head and put a mask on her, put her in front of a mirror so she can adapt her self image. During this time she is feed water, vegetables, candy high on sugar, as little protein as possible. The food is given to her while in bondage or it is served on the floor in bowl. Put her in a lot of bondage and sensory deprivation for long period of time while being used and abused. she needs to understand she is not in control, keep a pressure on her; never let her fully rest during all this. Your goal is to keep her in a confused, volatile state of mind where she is bombarded physically and verbally with everything you can think of. When she start to give in she will accept your treatment of her, she is in a fragile state where she accept anything you through at her. Now it is time to rebuild her.

The rebuild phase is where you imprint her with your thoughts about being a slave. By strict rules, constant control, micro management, guidance and very clear goals she will become your most valuable property, she will never leave your side or stray again. Train her in bondage, sexual services, domestic service, pain/pleasure, humiliation, obedience, posture, objectification, dehumanization, pierce her, brand her, tattoo her, do everything you want with her and keep doing it to remove every limit and boundary she has left.It takes a lot of effort on your part to keep her this way. Keep consistency, follow up on everything, give her attention, punish her when she is being bad, and if you like, reward her when she is doing good. She is your pet and property and you deserve her and you should be proud of your accomplishment.

This is some of the things I do and do well I might say. Tell me your thoughts about this and how to go about a stubborn unproductive slave…we are all learning and we are all friends here with the same goal, to keep slaves and have a good life having them around.

What's in a collar

I don't really understand it when I see a slave being collared from the first day? A collar is a mark of excellence, a proof of obedience and, most of all, a hard to earn level of ownership, something to be proud of and look forward too. Don't you agree?

A training collar on the other hand is what the slave wears during training and when she needs to be restricted, it is mostly a larger or wider collar made of leather or steel, not something you take outside in the vanilla world, not if you don't want to offend the general public anyway. A slave can still be wearing training collars after being collared of course.

I usually collar a slave after at least a year's training, she also get special rings in her labia’s or clit hood. Branding is also something I would consider for a lifetime slave, but so far I only have had long term slaves here on limited contract, so it has not been an option.